Many individuals are drawn to seek depth psychotherapy as a result of their relationship difficulties. What started as a stable bond of mutuality now regresses into conflict, unhappiness and disappointment. Reasons which motivate a couple to seek psychotherapy include:
…Sexual and intimacy problems
…Proximity and distance
…Control and dependency
…Parenting of children
The psychological phenomenon of attraction, of “love at first sight” illustrates the powers of unconscious forces which enter into all relationships. Strong emotional attachments are formed when individuals “see” a special quality in the other individual. This attraction is often the subjective experience of finding a missing part of oneself in the other. Since this linking is the interplay of largely unconscious energies, individuals are often unaware that their mutual projections end up blurring the other’s true nature thus preventing authentic encounter. When a couple suffers these difficulties, the partners often attempt to solve their impasse using a variety of psychological defenses which ultimately fail to resolve the issue. Couples therapy serves as an experiential container where the unconscious patterns of relating for both partners are examined. This exploration brings to light core fears such as abandonment and anticipation of repeated trauma. Within the setting of greater trust, each individual surrenders old defenses and can gradually risk deeper intimacy through a more authentic relating to self and other.
The moment I heard my first love story I started
looking for you, not knowing how blind that was.
Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere. They’re in each
other all along.”